In this week’s episode of NCLEX Ready, I am doing something a bit different. Instead of sharing with you tips and tricks you can use to pass the NCLEX, I’ll be sharing with you funny and shocking stories from real-life nurses.
As you know, working as a nurse is not all roses and sunshine. Our job is one of the most demanding out there. It’s mentally, emotionally, and physically draining, which is why I believe finding a bit of humor in our day-to-day life is a must!
These stories might make you scared of becoming a nurse or they might just make you laugh and agree that they are simply what happens in a typical day of nursing.
Either way, I hope you enjoy them as much as I did (and believe me, I did)!
Are you ready?
Let’s dive in!
Funny Story #1: A Diaper Change Gone Wrong
“They assigned me to this crazy patient who was not in his right mind. When I entered the room with my coworker to change the patient’s diaper, he grabbed a poop from his diaper and threw it towards me. I ducked and it landed on my coworker. This was before the pandemic, so we didn’t have our gowns and masks on. She refused to help me with my patients for the rest of the day. Can’t say I blame her, but what should I have done? Not duck?”
Funny Story #2: A Patient With a Third Eye
“I am a Nurse Practitioner and I worked in a women’s health clinic. I do not know what goes through some patients’ minds, but this patient stated that she had a third eye. So I told her that’s fine and irrelevant to her condition considering that I assumed that she was talking about the supernatural. When I went to examine her vaginal area, I found a plastic eyeball in her vagina. She thought it would be hilarious for me to find.”
Funny Story #3: The Story of the Guy With One Shoe
“I spent a good five minutes looking for a patient’s shoe for discharge. In the nursing world, spending five minutes on something like this is a long time when you have so much to do. The patient was losing his patience and asked me what I was looking for. I told him I misplaced his other shoe and he said, ‘Do you not realize I only have one foot?’ I felt so stupid for the rest of the day, but at least he found it hilarious.”
Funny Story #4: A Story Every ER Nurse Has
“I was overworked and understaffed on this particular day. I walked into my patient’s room and she asked me to help her put the dildo into her butt! I was so speechless that I just walked back out. Can’t even say that was the last time that someone showed me a dildo in the ER.”
Funny Story #5: A Man Who Confessed to a Crime He Didn’t Commit
“This patient was telling me that he was a necrophiliac. I was at a loss for words and got my manager involved. I had no idea why he was telling me this. Things got heated because he had no idea why I reported him and got my manager. After further discussion, it turns out he was trying to say that he was a hemophiliac. Sir, that’s not even close and you couldn’t be more dead wrong!”
Funny Story #6: “That’s Not My Son!”
“I was providing care for a patient when his elder visitor walked in. I told her that her son’s condition was improving and that he should be expecting to go home soon. Turns out that the patient was not her son. He is her husband. She was so offended that she requested a new nurse. I was so embarrassed that I was more than okay to switch assignments. I’m keeping my mouth shut from now on and not making assumptions anymore.”
Funny Story #7: Human Fluids Everywhere
“My colleague asked me to switch with him because he was tired of getting the difficult patient who requires wheelchair transfer assistance and he wanted my AC ambulatory patient. On this particular shift, which is out of my patient’s normal behavior, he requested a urinal container. My colleague had to assist him with urinating into the container three times. On the last urination, the patient said that he was done. So when my colleague removed the urinal container, the urine stream hit him right in the face. I had to walk away laughing.”
Funny Story #8: Eggplant Surprise!
“I worked in the ER and, of course, you can’t walk out of the ER profession without having some crazy stories. This patient stated that he was in pain in his rectum and didn’t know why. Upon assessment, I discovered an eggplant in his rectum. I asked him how it got there and he’s swore he didn’t know how. After we removed the eggplant, he asked me if he could leave with the eggplant so he could make dinner.”
Funny Story #9: Pole Dancing Class in the Hospital
“I was sitting at the nursing station when the alarm went off, the one that states that the patient’s vitals are all over the place. My mind was ready to call the rapid response team and I grabbed my coworker and ran into the room. When we got inside, the patient was just dancing naked on the IV pole, grinding and everything. I was not expecting that at all.”
Funny Story #10: That’s One Way to Eat Cake
“I’m sure you’ve heard plenty of ER stories with objects inside a patient’s private area, but this one takes the cake. Literally! We found that the patient had tried to smush an entire cake into his rectum and we do not know why. We definitely were not expecting to find that upon our assessment.”